Links to all the parts of my story for easy reference.
1 - http://diaryofaholmesian.blogspot.com/2009/05/adventure-of-gold-engraved-box-part-1.html
2 - http://diaryofaholmesian.blogspot.com/2009/06/adventure-of-gold-engraved-box-part-2.html
3 - http://diaryofaholmesian.blogspot.com/2009/07/adventure-of-gold-engraved-box-part-3.html
4 - http://diaryofaholmesian.blogspot.com/2009/07/adventure-of-gold-engraved-box-part-4.html
5 - http://diaryofaholmesian.blogspot.com/2009/08/adventure-of-gold-engraved-box-part-5.html
I edited the last bit of 5, because I didn't like the end. heh. So it's different. Enjoy!
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Yay, thank you!!!
ReplyDeleteI really needed more reading to distract me from my schoolwork. :-)
Lady Amy
I'm still reading it, but one quick thing. In The Empty House, Watson says he only fainted once but technically Watson faints at the end of five...so is this after the Return, or did he not "faint"? just curious, if you don't mind I'll have more comments when I'm done.
ReplyDeleteI should warn you sometimes go into to critic mode, but it's never very bad. :-)
Lady Amy going on a rave in her attic. :-D
*laughs* Wow, you're really smart that you remembered that...I actually hadn't thought of that at all. This is not really any particular place in the chronology of the canon...it's just there. lol Watson did faint, though...in my story...but yeah, it wasn't supposed to tie in with the canon anywhere. lol
ReplyDeleteIt's alright, I'm all for critics. I'm not easily offended so say what you please, I take everything constructively and keep it in mind for later :)
we can place it chronologically after the return, though, if need be ;)
ReplyDeleteI read it yesterday--good job!!! Some wonderful lines, like the travelling in circles one. =) I especially liked the end of Part 1; and I was also glad when Watson figured out the last part of the box in Part 4. :D
ReplyDeleteThank you, Marian :) Funny thing about the circles line was that I knew I wanted him to say that before I even knew what the story was going to be about...and then it fit perfectly :) lol
ReplyDeleteOkay...so first as a story I loved it, it was wonderful, you should more, and post them here. :-) I.E. it was very very well written. Now about the Holmes bit, I think Watson expresses too much surprise at certain things, such as the newspaper, and then his another clever disguise bit doesn't sound quite Watson. Holmes seems a little bit emotional for Holmes, but then in the situation you put I can almost see him doing his little nice bits. I laughed when I got to the everybody enjoying their tea, I did like that, though that I unHolmesish a bit. (I just made word, cool!) As far as the anagram that was a diabolicly hard if not unsolvable one you put in there, one generally has to have a longer anagram to solve it. And now one last thing, coming from a medical family, I didn't like why Watson fainted, I don't you faint from over eating. And as far as fainting Doyle left just enough room for doubt, that we could concievably say that Watson fogot about fainting this time. :-D
ReplyDeleteSorry when I read a really good story, I start picking, so really it's a compliment that I did this.
Lady Amy
Ah, no, it's perfectly fine, I really enjoy constructive criticism :) You do have a point.
ReplyDeleteThe tea thing...I was aiming for a bit of lightheartedness, so I'm glad you laughed. I did understand it was "unHolmesish" (I LOVE that word, btw, I might use that sometime! lol) but I thought it would be good to add a little humor (because it IS so uncharacteristic of him..thus why I made a point of saying so.)
I do understand the fainting thing, and I have a perfectly good explanation for it. *laughs* So you know I did this in installments. I wrote it as I went...I wrote a part, then posted it, and then wrote another part. So I decided to make Watson faint in part 4...the original plan included food poisoning (done by the criminal). So I wrote up that bit, and posted it, got a bunch of comments and stuff...and started working on part 5. And I *really* didn't like how it turned out...it seemed way too fake, I guess...and it didn't really make sense. In any case, I was stuck, and decided to just leave it the way it was - he ate way too much, and wasn't feeling well, and with the bit of shock from himself discovering the Crown Jewels that Scotland Yard couldn't find...yeah. lol It wasn't my favorite ending, but I was really stuck and couldn't do anything about it that time :)
As for the anagram...hey, it's Holmes. He can do anything, including solving really really hard anagrams :D
I'm glad you critiqued it, I love getting outside opinions, and now I have lots of stuff to keep in mind for next time! Thanks a bunch, Lady Amy :D
Yeah I meant to add that it sounded like he got poisoned from eating HOlmes food, so that explains that bit...
ReplyDeleteI know Holmes can do anything, that's what's so fun. :-)
You know I look forward to any future stories...Hint hint nudge nudge kick kick....:-D
I need something to waste my time on. :-D
I'm glad you don't mind, some people might of, I'm out of my "fit" now and would like to emphasize, that it was very good not only as a story, but as a Holmes story.
~Lady Amy wasting time in her attic~