Scene 6 – safari. Trio is squished into a carriage, BW in the middle
SH (thoughtfully, to no one in particular, looking out the window of the carriage): One should never go through life without taking a safari.
GB (raises eyebrows, leans forward to be sure SH isn’t paying attention. Whispers rather harshly) Don’t think I didn’t see you two out in the garden playing lovers.
BW (surprised) You *saw?*
GB (holds finger to lips) Shhh. If he hears it’s all over.
BW (checks to be sure Holmes isn’t paying attention. Whispers) Sorry. We were not ‘playing lovers.’ He saw I wasn’t feeling well and offered to take me outside for a stroll in the garden.
GB (heatedly) For goodness’ sake, if that’s not playing lovers, I don’t know what is.
SH (stirs from his contemplating mood)
GB and BW look out opposite window quickly
GB (fuming inwardly)
BW (rather annoyed)
(All is silent for a few moments)
SH (leaps out of seat and points frantically out the window) There it is!
GB and BW (startled, jump up)
BW : There what is, Holmes?
GB (chokes and elbows BW)
BW (glares)
SH (excitedly, still standing in the small compartment) The animal I’ve always wanted to see in reality. I’ve written a monograph on them, but I have never actually *seen* one…(sits down and rubs hands together)
BW (confused look) Wha..?
GB (shrugs) I have no idea…
BW: No, I mean…I know what the animal is…I always wondered why he wrote a monograph on them…
SH is not participating in this conversation…he is eagerly staring out the window, watching some unknown creature worm its way through the tall grass
GB (nudges BW) What is it, obsessive, smarty-pants woman?
BW (still confused, in a sort of trance) I’ve read all of his monographs on everything from cigar ash to…
GB: SERIOUSLY, Bre! What is it?
BW (comes out of trance, matter of factly) Oh, it’s a platypus.
GB (mortified) Um…Mr. Holmes?
SH (doesn’t reply)
BW (bites lip trying not to laugh)
GB Mr. Holmes…are you, by any chance, referring to a…a…platypus?
SH (turning from the window) Yes, Miss Brennan, I am.
BW (emits a weird sound SH takes to be a giggle)
SH Miss Ward, I must ask that you stop making such noises. It’s very unbecoming of you.
BW (composes self) Sorry, Holmes.
GB (fuming, elbows BW again. Through clenched teeth) Hoolmes?
BW (innocently) He said I could.
GB (teeth still clenched) HE said you could!? He didn’t say I could!
SH (startled) Who didn’t say who could do what, Miss Brennan?
GB (confused, and a little embarrassed) It’s nothing, Mr. Holmes.
BW (trying to suppress laughter. Thinking:) I have triumphed! YES!
GB: (to SH) I have, however, been meaning to ask you…oh…this is silly…but…could I possibly…call you
Holmes?
SH (laughs softly): I had been waiting for you to ask that, Miss Brennan. Naturally you may.
(Trio exits carriage onto brick walkway)
SH (offers arm to BW)
BW (takes it and flashes an evil grin at GB)
GB (fuming, trailing behind)
BW: Where are we going now, Holmes?
SH: We are, at present, heading back to the inn. You two may freshen up while I retrieve my walking stick,
which, in my haste, I had forgotten to bring along. Then we shall go to dinner and possibly the opera.
BW (beams) The opera? I love the opera!
GB (runs to catch up) Me too! What after? Are we still pursuing the safety pin?
BW (reminded of Fluffy; thoughtfully) Holmes…
SH Yes, my dear?
GB (screams inwardly)
BW I don’t really want to put Fluffy through this terrible affair again…but…what if, instead of chasing Mr.
Moran around the globe, we simply placed another silver safety pin in Fluffy’s cage? Then we could hold a stake-out, and catch our culprit in the act!
GB (rolls eyes and wonders what on earth is up with this safety pin nonsense)
SH That is an excellent idea, my dear Miss Ward. We will not know if it would work unless we try. Let us
remain here in
NON EXEUNT…continue to scene 7
Well, I am very pleased to announce that, with last night's conclusion of the Silver Safety Pin Finale...we hit 68 pages on my MSW *high fives Grace* Now, if only I could do this when I write fanfics on my own...:P
ReplyDeleteah I can just see you two arguing...
ReplyDelete*seperates Grace and Bre, now now children, think what "HOlmes" is thinking...
This is such a queer mix of Holmesish and Unholmesish...that's what makes it so fun..so what did HOlmes and Bre discuss in the garden...and can we have more now. :-)
By the way how did you and Grace meet? And is Grace really taller? :-)
Oh and Bre, does not haveing seen my really good friend ever except in internet class, and that doesn't count worse that not having met for seven years? :-)
Lady Amy in her attic champing at the bit...I know unlady like. :-)
Oh I say, it just occured to me me dears, that that comments should be called clues, to go along with the closed cases. :-)
ReplyDelete:-D totally random I know. :-)
Lady Amy in her attic being random
Ah, Amy...believe it or not, we argued (playfully of course) for two whole DAYS about who Holmes belongs to. *giggles* It's been resolved now, thank goodness.
ReplyDeleteI don't rightly know what I talked about with Holmes, in all honesty. We were, in all likelihood, just strolling arm in arm and being observant :P
Grace and I met...well, as you know, 7 years ago, when we both lived up in Michigan, at a..sort of..Christian girl-scouts type thing called Missionettes. We practically spent...4th and 5th grade, was it?...together...and then she moved out-of-state, and then about 3 years later we moved out-of-state. But we've kept in touch, and I'd say that we're closer friends now than we were back in the day :P And yes, Grace is taller than me in real life :D
Mmm..yes, I do believe it's harder when you know someone personally, and have actually met them, and you get separated for a long period of time than it is when you have never met someone, if that is indeed what you are asking. Even though I have two very close friends whom I also met in Latin class that I've never met..and for some reason it's not as bad as not seeing Grace or my other friends from MI. Though don't get me wrong, I would *love love love* to meet my online friends face-to-face :)
"One should never go through life without taking a safari." Lol!
ReplyDeleteI'd LOVE to see this filmed or on stage.
Haha Marian...funny you mention it, because Grace and I just talked the other about filming it someday :D We are currently on the look-out for Jeremy Brett look-alikes, if you find one, direct him here, please. *giggles*
ReplyDeleteright, address please. :-) True, Bre, True.
ReplyDeleteThe solution you know would be for neither of you to get HOlmes. :-) Sorry I'm rooting for Grace, she is so...so graceful. :-) Cowers underneath weapons thrown by Bre. :-)
Lady Amy, cowering in her attic. :-)
Wow...this is amazing! :D
ReplyDeleteIt *would* be awesome as a stage thing-a-ma-jig...yeah.
haaaha very funny. Actually, I do think Grace deserves Holmes, she's much more intellectual than I am, and would fit in better. But I'm just not ready to give him up yet :P
ReplyDeleteAww...I can't believe you just said that, Bre. =) You nice person you. lol
ReplyDeleteWell, it's the truth, is it not? That still doesn't mean he's yours though, because he's still mine, it's just that you deserve him more than me :P
ReplyDelete...but he's so smart, he'll deduce that I deserve him more than you. *hides in her snuggie*
ReplyDeleteThen I'll just keep him away from you. *giggles* So he doesn't have a chance to deduce it. :P
ReplyDeleteSuch a dastardly deed will never stop SHERLOCK HOLMES! *wields the crowbar menacingly with Holmes at her side, ready to use baritsu* lol
ReplyDelete-.- oh dear.
ReplyDeleteSo...I throw a snuggie on you and get you all tangled up, and then run away with Holmes to...a cave. :P Where you won't find us.