The Wallaby of Death - Part 6

Scene 6 - Ferrari

Driving along

Something falls from the sky

Bre (looking around): What was that?

Grace (picking something up off the floor of the vehicle): It looks like a sugar cube.

Bre (puzzled): Sugar cubes don’t fall from the sky.

Holmes (sarcastically): What a revelation!

Bre (sigh)

More sugar cubes pelt the car from all directions. Watson slows the car to a stop in the middle of

the road.

Watson (frustrated): What is going on?

Bre (solemnly): Bad things.

Grace: Bad things happen in the countryside.

Holmes (leaps out of the car without opening the door and dodges flying sugar cubes; leaps onto

hood of Ferrari)

Watson (cringes): Hooolmes….

Holmes: Unseen foes…HEAR ME.

Bre and Grace look at each other, puzzled)

Holmes: Declare yourselves…and your motives…

Watson (jumps onto hood of car with Holmes): Or your civilization shall be destroyed!

Holmes (looks at Watson in surprise): Very good, dear fellow.

Watson: I try.

Bre and Grace stare blankly at the men on the hood of the car as Mary screams from the trunk

From the woods, another person emerges and leaps onto the hood of the car

Person: Followers, disperse!

Much rustling ensues as the followers disperse

Holmes (addressing the person): What is the meaning of throwing sugar cubes in such a hostile

manner?

Person: Uh…it seemed like a good idea at the time…

Watson: Who are you?

Person (triumphant): I am Amy, leader of the Fairy Seekers!

Holmes and Watson exchange puzzled glances over Amy’s head

Bre and Grace stifle laughter

Grace: Fairy Seekers?

Amy: Um…yeah.

Holmes: And what, pray tell, is the primary occupation of…a Fairy Seeker?

Amy: Um…we seek fairies.

Holmes (face palms)

Watson: And how do you go about that enterprise?

Amy (hops down from hood of car): We use sugar cubes and jars.

Bre: Ummm…kay.

Amy begins to wander around, retrieving the sugar cubes from the ground. Watson follows suit

and wanders into the woods.

Mary (shouting and pounding in the trunk): HELP! HELP ME!

Amy (stops): What is that?

Grace: Nothing…nothing at all…

Amy: ARE YOU KIDNAPPERS?!?!?!

Holmes (mischievous look): Yes.

Bre and Grace freak out

Grace: HOLMES! We are not kidnappers!

Bre: No no, we’re not!

Amy (dashes toward the trunk): We must let her out! (to Mary) Friend, I am here to help you

escape from these dangerous ruffians!

Mary (muffled): THANK YOU

Bre, Grace and Holmes dash toward the trunk

Holmes (trying to restrain Amy): No, we cannot let her out!

Bre (sits on trunk lid)

Amy (fights Holmes) No! KIDNAPPERS! HELP!!!

Grace (motions for Bre to get off the trunk and opens lid)

Mary (tries to leap out but is restrained by Bre)

Holmes shoves Amy in the trunk, and helps Bre to shove Mary in the trunk and shuts the lid.

The girls scream and thrash about

Watson returns from the woods with pocketfuls of sugar cubes and hears the commotion.

Watson: Holmes! What is that heinous noise?

Holmes: Watson, Watson…have even your most rudimentary powers of observation failed you?

That is the sound of agitated females shrieking and kicking each other in a confined space. I am

surprised at you…it is far too elementary.

Watson (rolls eyes): Why yes, quite silly of me, Holmes.

Bre: How long are we going to keep them there?

Holmes: Whatever length of time proves necessary.

Bre: I see.

Everyone returns to the car and Watson begins to drive again.

EXEUNT